Kind of snailception. Interesting theory, interesting... But... NO.

So.. how do you call a Mexican that lost his car? CARLOS. HAAAA. Knock-out.

This is a "must do" on my list. Definitely.

No great story ever started by eating a salad. At least as far as I know.

That dumb moment when you already said what like three times and you still have no idea what he said. Ugh.

You probably got touched, don't. Not as cute as it seems.

You're never going to guess what happened today, come in quick and I'll show you.

Shit still happens, day or night, it doesn't matter.

Now that's the quickest cure for constipation. Autch.

You're really going to be like "awwwwww". Indeed. See?