You Sir are defintely doing it wrong. Totally wrong. What's wrong with you?
Are you looking for a boat? Because I am looking for land.
In case of a sudden flood, I'm covered.
Any water on your side, Bob?
There is a certain upside to this: you can take you entire football team along with you. Just don't expect them to turn the boat around for you if you fall down.
I don't really care what you look like, but the boat has to be shining.