I'm sure the deputy is thrilled to investigate each report from the vigilant citizens.

We ain't got no advertising ideas, so we'll just go ahead with this.

As you might have guessed it, I need someone to slay the dragon that has been wondering around town lately. Surely a newspaper ad will take care of this and bring forth any brave volunteers.

Browsing an adult magazine has never been easier. But try to make it believable and keep that newspaper aligned.

We lost Snowden, but we found our red panda. What a happy day!

The horse was mortified upon hearing the man's intentions.

At least he is reading the proper newspaper.

And once we reached that point nothing happened. Guess those activists should set another milestone.

When it gets really high it will be even colder. Wait what?

So I got myself a Gym access card, now I'll just sit on my ass, read this paper and I'll surely grow some big muscles by the end of the month.