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Firstname lastname

Firstname lastname

I am sure that I've heard that name before someplace...

Wet roads

Wet roads

We definitely need to keep this cable subscription thing going. The quality of news is staggering!

Les McBurney

Les McBurney

I don't know why, but everyone wanted me to join the fire department ever since I was little. So I did.

Whet Faartz

Whet Faartz

We have a new interview with Mr Faartz, who is always happy to answer our questions. For some reason it always stinks in this hospital...

Brake fluid needed

Brake fluid needed

I told you guys that I needed my brakes fixed.

Facebook video expert

Facebook video expert

I don't know who this guy is and where he comes from but I need him hired immediately. Someone who knows how to post Facebook videos is clearly someone I want to work with.

Black suspect

Black suspect

We are looking for a suspect. We know he is black. Give us some tips and we'll get right over and arrest this guy.

Meet Jack Mehoff

Meet Jack Mehoff

Jack made it to the news again. This time Heywood Jablome has a competitor.

President is hungry

President is hungry

We interrupt this program to give you the latest developments: it seems that the president is going to get something to eat. Stay tuned as we unveil his food preferences.

Quote from man stabbed

Quote from man stabbed

The suspect was released because the victim clearly taunted him.