Just take one of these notices an you will start feeling better after only two weeks! You might go bankrupt later, but who cates about the future?

The patio is closed. So it is not open. If it was open, then it would definitely not be closed. If it wasn't closed, then it would be open. So it is closed. Because it is not open.

This dog is simply missed. And I'm the one missing him so... take notice... and... carry on.

Come to think of it, this may be the best way to convince them to keep it down during sexy times.

Imagine that they needed to put this sign up. I wouldn't want to meet any Magic: The Gathering players.

Guess what? Somebody actually went down faster than expected with the elevator shaft.

This is definitely an engineer. Everything is correct, but useless at the same time.

What? You mean to tell me that you used your penis to enter the PIN? Oh, pen. Right.

Want an easy fix? Just hire some tall staff and your problems will be a thing of the past.

Under no circumstances are you to place any sings over here.