You have to get me out of this keyboard factory. They are keeping me here against my will and forcing me to build keyboards all day long.

Why should I simply lay down with my neck on the track? I want to live every moment of it.

Yo dawg, we heard you like adapters so we put an adapter in an adapter in an...

I need to reach in deep and grab one. Just like dad would do.

I was born in another millenium, before Google even existed, before smartphones, WiFi and the Compact Disk.

And your relatives while you are at it. The pets are not enough.

If God hadn't made whiskey, the Irish would have ruled the entire world.

If you found 5 dollars it means someone lost that money, dumbass.

Ever since Skyrim came out, the single relationship statuses have taken over Facebook.

This is what happends when you take your cat to McDonald's every single day.