I have the worst life ever. This house is too big.

Good thing I was able to find jeans with bigger pockets, otherwise I would have had to get fat.

If the dog kept jumping out I needed to restrain him somehow. At least this way he can enjoy the wind in his face.

Only when the spider disappears you'll have that "oh shit" moment.

I guess he had a really serious problem. You know what I mean.

Don't worry, I'll take care of the dog. Problem solved!

Uh-oh.... Okay kitty, be nice, be nice!

If a cat never falls on the back and.. blah blah. Then, we solved the energy problem.

I lick my owners but they never lick me back. Aughh..

There's never a problem seeing a spider, it's a problem when the spider disappears.