Make sure your mom is protected. Get her a special gift this Mother's Day!

My love cannot be represented by anything more than a Nokia phone.

Even if everybody died because of your physical appearance, I'd still love you.

Be the chick that wears this shirt to a party. You will get laid guaranteed.

I love order but I park like a dumbass all the time.

I know your dog died,but we can still keep it for you. It will be just like old times.

Leave me alone woman, can't you see I have a wedding ring?

Our love is definitely not infinite, it's just a waste of time.

Nowdays almost everything is better than Twilight.

Oh, look what we got here. I simply love you!