Remember all the things your mom told you not to do? Well she's not here so why worry?

Millions of gallons of alcohol are wasted each and every year. Don't be a part of the problem. Be the solution and finish your beer before leaving.

Wife told me to go get some milk. I'm not sure what flavor she wanted so I should get all of them just in case.

Looks like pops is getting ready for another bingo night.

I think I found my calling. I need to spend all my time with them.

Where there's no beer there's breakfast. I cannot eat without any beer around.

It seems that saying this doesn't help very much.

I'm going to wait for this guy to load everything, then cut him off and hit the brakes.

Shoot that beer out of your system.

No use having a cast if I can't do something useful like opening a beer with it.